Er... I mean the much anticipated baby shower. *Sigh*. So, I love showers of all kinds: baby, bridal, wedding, etc. I love all the games, the company, the food and even most of all, watching the guest of honor open all her gifts. I think I am the only person who loves this part however but I am a nosy person so I want to see what people got the honoree. I hate when I go to birthday parties and they don't open the gifts in front of the guests. But that is the not the point of a b-day party... it is the point, however, of a shower.
Anywho.... as with any pregnancy, most people expect some sort of celebration to accompany the much awaited birth. Initially, I was against the idea of having a baby shower. I have to admit, I am a little embarrassed to have yet another one, after having already had THREE! I do believe every child is special and deserves to be celebrated but I was just not in the mood for another baby shower in my honor.
Well, hubby's family and my friends would not hear of such talk... no baby shower? What? It's almost like a crime. So I relented and allowed who ever felt the need to go ahead and make plans for a shower for this baby. After all, I am not going to REFUSE a party!
Now, I know about all the talk out there about how inappropriate or tacky it is to have a shower for a second, third, etc baby. I know there are a lot people who think that a baby shower should only be reserved for a first time mom, where the idea is to shower her with gifts to help out with the new baby and give her a head start in her new life as a parent. I know what the etiquette is... but seriously, screw etiquette. It is 2013. Not 1945. Times have changed and so should some people's thought process.
Now, no one I know in person thinks like this... I got all this from various message boards I have frequented throughout the years. And I was in shock at how many people shared such a sentiment. Like, why is it not OK to have a baby shower for a second or third child? Well, there are some exceptions to that "rule". If a child is born 5 plus years after the first (etc) and/or is the opposite sex, then a baby shower is OK. Some have even come up with a term to make a celebration for a second time (3rd, 4th, 5th) mom OK. It's called a "baby sprinkle'. The sprinkle, smaller than a shower, is a celebration where close friends and family get together and buy the mom to be again smaller items like diapers, wipes and other baby essentials that she might not (well, most likely doesn't) have. Since the sprinkle is a smaller event, it's faux paus for the mom to register. Without a registry, guests tend NOT to buy bigger items as they figure the mom should have these items in store from the first baby and should be able to reuse them (of course this thought process changes IF the next baby is coming over 5 years after the previous).
I understand how some people might be turned off if say, a mom who just had a baby 2 years ago and had a grande shower with a huge registry list decides to do the very same thing for baby #2 (or so on). You don't really need everything to be brand new for baby, just in good and usable condition. So that I get. But to celebrate with a smaller party with smaller gifts (mostly necessities like clothes and the like) is very much OK in my book.
That had nothing to do with why I didn't want a shower... I don't care what other people (strangers) say. Or think about how my life is lived. So another shower for baby number 4 it is. Today my mother in law told me to pick a date so she can start planning the shower (I have asked that it be on the smaller side though... I don't want to open gifts for the 4th time around in front of 40 something people). She wants to host the shower in July and so my job is to pick a date and help make invitations.
I guess I have to admit I am kind of thankful that I will be having a shower after all. It will take some of the burden off us and we'll be able to get a few smaller items that we won't have to buy right away ourselves. Also, it's just another excuse for my nearest and some of my dearest to get together and celebrate with me... it's been a while since the family has had a gathering and most of them hve not seen me pregnant as yet. Besides, after the horrible start I had to this pregnancy, it's nice to finally be able to celebrate it. I guess I look forward to the shower and I really hope I don't embarrass myself or cry.
Maharana Udai Singh II
3 years ago