Friday, June 2, 2017

Being A Teen Mom

I was a teen mom, 19 years old to be exact, when I had my first son.  That seems like it was so long ago.  17 years ago now actually.  Looking back on those times as a young mom, it makes me wish time didn't fly by so fast.

I enjoyed being a young mom.  It wasn't something that happened to me accidentally.  My mom was a young mother and I idolized her, so it was natural for me to want to imitate her in that sense. However,  I knew I didn't want to be 15 and pregnant in high school.  That was not a goal of mine.  And I wasn't going to get knocked up by just any random high school boy either.  I was going to wait until I found 'The One", the person I felt was my soul mate to start a family with.  I didn't actually think it would happen in high school, so it's not like being a young mom was something that occupied my thoughts.  But I always wanted to be a mother and I just felt it was in my destiny to be a young one.

When I did find my 'person', my husband, I knew he would be the one to father my children.  And it turns out, he wanted to be a young dad too.  We could have waited and might have benefited in life if we had, but we didn't want to wait.

We got lucky that in our situation, being teen parents didn't end up in a disaster.  We were blessed with a very supportive family and a few very understanding close friends.  And through our ups and downs, we managed to make it out on the other side together.

I have grown a lot in the last 17 plus years as a mother.  In my 30's now, I can look back on some of the mistakes I've made as a young mom and laugh about some of the things I thought or did back then.  Not to say I don't still make mistakes as a mother now because no mom is perfect.  And honestly, I still have a lot of learning and growing left to do.  Motherhood is ever evolving and new situations come up that we need to learn to deal with everyday.

However, It's nice to reflect on the positives and negatives of being a young mom in my teens and an older mom in my 30's.  There were a few benefits to being a teen mom like having more energy and just being young!  The benefits I enjoy as an older mom is having a sense of myself and just being more established as a mother.  But with all the good, there comes a bad side too.  Young moms are judged, constantly.  It's hard not to be pushed into a stereotypical box by society.  There are also a few drawbacks that younger moms face, like financial burdens and school issues to name a few.  And on the flip side, not everything comes up roses for older moms.  A few find themselves exhausted by the daily task of motherhood, not to mention older moms find themselves trying to balance it all because they feel like they should have it all together.

What I've learned by being a mom on both ends of the age spectrum is, motherhood is hard no matter your age.  Motherhood is not something to conquer, it's something to enjoy.  So no matter what your age, just enjoy it.  Because, time flies by way too fast and in no time, you'll be staring face to face with the next stage: being a grandmother.

No comments: