The Great Debate

For many moms that can't (or won't) breastfeed, formula is, to them, the next best thing. Although it's touted as the alternative to breast milk, I disagree. And while many will debate that it is, it isn't, plain and simple. There IS no alternative to breast milk. Breast milk is best. Period! End of discussion! I may ruffle feathers here, but it's just the way I see it. (And how a lot of other moms see it as well).

Most babies do flourish on formula (my first son did). And for a lot of moms, the benefits of formula far outweigh the risks. It's fortified with nutrients and minerals and all that good stuff to help a developing baby grow. Plus doctors and hospitals go as far as handing out free samples, almost encouraging moms who don't know better to formula feed their infants. If it's good enough for them, it's good enough for my son, or so I thought.

My son weaned himself at 4 months, which, according to many experts, should not have happened as babies don't tend to wean themselves until around 8 to 10 months of age. Well, due to some short-sightedness on my part and a lack of support for breastfeeding in my family, I introduced my son to formula. He much preferred that to my milk.

I've read that babies tend to prefer a bottle because it's easier for them to suck from and they don't have to work as hard to get the milk. I was a young mom, a first time mom and had not done my research. Plus, I was being told by my grandmother, my mother-in-law and even hubby's aunt to give my baby formula. I was told that my baby could not be getting enough milk from me because my boobs are "too small". Poor baby must be hungry, they said. "Give him some formula". So I did.

As a christening present, hubby's aunt gave me packages of formula... I was all too ready to try it out. I figured having him drink formula from a bottle would ease my discomfort of breastfeeding in public... and it was way better than having him stuck to my breast ALL THE TIME. I made a mistake and to this day I regret it. My boobs are not too small... proof 9 years later with my two younger kids. Princess breastfed solely for 6 months and weaned at 14 months. And Fatty is successfully breastfeeding at 8 and a half months. Thank you very much! I should have stood up for my beliefs and what I wanted to do with my baby (and my boobies). I should have read my breastfeeding book back then, 'So That's What They're For' by Janet Tamaro. It helped me tremendously with my daughter and really opened my eyes to formula's many dangers and the many benefits of breast milk. It's called liquid gold for a reason.

Now why would any mom (who can) choose NOT to breastfeed? It puzzles me. It just seems like we, as women, have this great gift to give our babies. To help secure their futures by starting them out on the right track with breast milk. By choosing not to breastfeed is like choosing not to give your child the very best life has to offer. Besides it's so easy (although there is a right way to breastfeed and a wrong way) and not to mention, free.

Once you get over that first hurdle of course (because for a lot of us, it starts out really hard, especially if we're breastfeeding wrong... engorged boobs, sore, cracked and bleeding nipples and risks of infection.) But after the bad, comes the 'oh so good'... once you get the hang of it. When your baby is hungry, all you have to do is pop out your boob and stick it in babies mouth. Like my book say, "insert breast A in mouth B ". And viola! Dinner (lunch and breakfast) is served. (This of course excludes the moms whose boobs are stuck to a breast pump morning, noon and night... which is difficult, time consuming and exhausting.) But these moms are willing to sacrifice their ever diminishing time and comfort to give their kids what they need and deserve.

With formula, you have to go through a process. You have to wash the bottles (if you don't have a clean one). You have to mix the formula. You have to warm the formula. You have to test the formula to make sure it's not too hot. And the process can be stressful if you have a screaming, crying, hungry baby. Breast milk comes ready to go and at the right temperature to boot.

Now, I don't want to sit on a high horse and point fingers. No one who chooses formula for their babies are bad parents. I did it with Boobie and he turned out fine. But would I take it back if I could? Yes! In a heart beat. I just feel like my other two will have a better start in life than he did since he missed out on so much by weaning so early. But to compare formula to breast milk is ludicrous. I am sorry. You cannot! It's like comparing apples to a big mac. They both taste good but one is FAR more superior health wise than the other.

I know some moms feel the guilt of society when and if they decide not to breastfeed. We're told to breastfeed. Doctors tell us to ( half assed, but they tell us). Even formula companies insert the 'breast is best' slogan in their ads. But while the message is out there to breastfeed, we're just not supposed to do it in public. It's a double edged sword... while moms who don't breastfeed feel the guilt, moms who do feel the scorn. It's disgusting to some. They don't want to see 'that'. And as natural as breastfeeding is, women are asked to either cover up or leave and take it someplace more private. 'So you can breastfeed, my dear, just not here... where people can see you".

I've never felt more at ease breastfeeding than I do now in Costa Rica. EVERYONE applauds you. You're looked at as somewhat as a hero. It's not uncommon to see a woman whip out her boob in public to feed her hungry child without hesitation or fear of public scorn. It's great!!!

So while I am not dissing a formula feeding mommy for doing her 'thang'. Just know and recognize that It's not the same as giving your baby a breast. And you can't debate or argue your way out of it. There's really no right or wrong way... but there is the best way. And formula is not it.